If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
