I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Everyone says I win the strip club
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
