so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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