Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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