I wish I only lived at night.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Randomize
