shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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