Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
