they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
