Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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