it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
