yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
