At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
