I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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