Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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