I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
