Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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