HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
