Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize