You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
