you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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