he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I can't trust your balls anymore.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
