bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
