Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize