Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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