A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
