He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
