I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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