i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
