phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
the room spins SO much faster in panama
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
