I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
