i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Text me some of your sweat
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
