if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
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