So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
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