So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
