Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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