respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
