Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
