Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
is that a dick in a sweater?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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