gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize