There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
