yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
