Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
