I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
