Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
