Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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