I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
