let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
