Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
