Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.

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  (203): Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/gcqa
  Replies (24) Good night (664) Bad night (2747)
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  (310): View more from California

  The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.

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  (310): The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss. http://tfl.nu/o71q
  Replies (23) Good night (1490) Bad night (4936)
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  (518): View more from New York

  You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.

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  (518): You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO. http://tfl.nu/kgev
  Replies (142) Good night (4235) Bad night (1190)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"

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  (208): U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!" http://tfl.nu/ttkj
  Replies (99) Good night (26865) Bad night (1521)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.

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  (540): She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her. http://tfl.nu/1bms
  Replies (13) Good night (4850) Bad night (1448)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.

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  (240): She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text. http://tfl.nu/g6ne
  Replies (4) Good night (677) Bad night (2244)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?

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  (218): Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday? http://tfl.nu/s08h
  Replies (5) Good night (2134) Bad night (926)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.

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  (651): asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night. http://tfl.nu/52m5
  Replies (13) Good night (1554) Bad night (641)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.

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  (978): Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace. http://tfl.nu/dayc
  Replies (4) Good night (1268) Bad night (482)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES

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  (734): WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES http://tfl.nu/4qd7
  Replies (5) Good night (1602) Bad night (673)
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.

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  (787): I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers. http://tfl.nu/zztx
  Replies (1) Good night (656) Bad night (923)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge

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  (518): Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge http://tfl.nu/f69s
  Replies (5) Good night (1529) Bad night (493)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  These people don't understand my stages of drunk

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  (850): These people don't understand my stages of drunk http://tfl.nu/g6eb
  Replies (2) Good night (490) Bad night (292)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much

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  (647): im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much http://tfl.nu/vzm3
  Replies (6) Good night (296) Bad night (716)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".

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  (508): We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them". http://tfl.nu/eeyg
  Replies (1) Good night (591) Bad night (295)

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