Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about http://tfl.nu/411c
  Replies (24) Good night (1157) Bad night (756)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Why did you take off so early

  (224): View more from Illinois

  No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Why did you take off so early (224): No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know. http://tfl.nu/xucj
  Replies (7) Good night (4661) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover. http://tfl.nu/xecz
  Replies (18) Good night (6732) Bad night (1182)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark. http://tfl.nu/009s
  Replies (44) Good night (7757) Bad night (2297)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together. http://tfl.nu/x99f
  Replies (11) Good night (4097) Bad night (1586)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back? http://tfl.nu/dswq
  Replies (12) Good night (932) Bad night (2681)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis. http://tfl.nu/6cer
  Replies (23) Good night (1409) Bad night (5512)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college. http://tfl.nu/9ysd
  Replies (14) Good night (3180) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.

  (1-870): View more from Arkansas

  You always know what to say to make me feel better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you. (1-870): You always know what to say to make me feel better. http://tfl.nu/or61
  Replies (2) Good night (1846) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please http://tfl.nu/sfv9
  Replies (11) Good night (1493) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying http://tfl.nu/m75c
  Replies (8) Good night (1706) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine. http://tfl.nu/qh5s
  Replies (2) Good night (1249) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich. http://tfl.nu/pg0v
  Replies (0) Good night (539) Bad night (308)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning. http://tfl.nu/se9h
  Replies (6) Good night (866) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair http://tfl.nu/wtff
  Replies (1) Good night (710) Bad night (189)

Randomize