dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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